Saturday, February 23, 2013

Treks Salvation of the Dance Flunkies * May 28, 2009

Treks Salvation of the Dance Flunkies

Current mood: tired
T-Salv & Dance Flunk; say what?  Star Trek too

This time it's all movie reviews so please choose one or more to check out.  I crave for feedback even if it's on an older one.

Terminator Salvation
Yesterday, T-4 finally came out.  I was too excited.  Some of the plugs for this gimmick gave me a few flinches before coming to see it.  The first sign of possibility weakness was the rating.  It’s a thing film productions have been doing to ‘reach’ a wider audience.  The first three Terminators were rated R but this one was the oh so dreaded PG-13.  The same PG-13 that made Alien v. Predator an action instead of a horror/thriller, the same PG-13 that all these parodies try to repeat what the Wayans did with Scary movie 1 & 2 but can’t hold up to the nastiness so they have to use kindergarten potty humor and that same PG-13 that is ruining Sesame Street from the hardcore ultimate bloodbath it use to be.  

The only actor I knew or really cared about now was Christian Bale (Batman Begins, American Psycho).  A few days before the movie came out, I started to get to know this awesome production was also Bryce Dallas something and Common.  As slightly off as the name Christian is, these other cast names are downright silly.  The director’s name is MCG(Mick-Gee), John Connor wife/girl-friend/baby’s mama/ is named Bryce (like rice but with a B), and Common(What the fudge?).  Watching the introduction credits I chuckled. 

I recognized Bryce’s name from the M. Night flicks ‘Village’ where she was the blind chick and ‘The lady in the water’, where she was the lady.  Common did a interview on PBS and is the hip-hoper in the tzune commercial fighting with the old guy.  Paying attention to the Common interview I heard him say something that I kind of thought was a bit interesting.  Common compared T4’s battle against the robots with today’s battle against Capitalism.  What?  Robots represent free market?  You think they’d represent some sort oppression.  Gyah, I won’t get too into it but sometimes if you actually listen to people you may hear some disturbing things.

Onto the review.  This movie had a challenge and it exceeded it   The first three Terminators were in a modern era where the robots were played by actors. Now, they can’t just use a street or a bar that’s already there.  They have to create a set themselves without being lazy and blue screening the background like Wolverine did.  This was accomplished.  There were bare parking lots, industrial robot factory and even a submarine.  The robots were fantastic in not allowing the audience to see any video game like features.  Showing the war had gone for awhile the Resistance could easily name the type of machine that was attacking them.  I actually want to learn these types so I am prepared when the crisis happens; it’s more realistic than zombies.  The hydrobots were the most attention-grabbing because of the way they invade the waters and made them more dangerous than if sharks or piranhas were in them.  Transformers 2 had a trailer prior to this and T-4 almost had a giant fireball blasting robot that is comparable.  The background T-4 created was believable and successful.  The only part I was surprised about was the hierarchy in this post apocalyptic world and how the UN, kind of, was cruising around in a Submarine.  The four nations in charge of everything were Japan, Russia, America, and some African nation.  I guess since it’s been 15 years since the explosion so if the humans want to create an efficient military system than they needed organization.  without scratch.

The camera use in this film was fun and made it very rollercoaster like.  This director or DP enjoyed sticking the camera to 1st person aspects.  At the very beginning there was a helicopter crash and the point of view was in that crashing helicopter.  I almost thought that a motion sickness warning was needed but this wasn’t abused.  It gives one the idea that they are in for a rollercoaster ride.

An interesting aspect I wanted to go over about the characters was the comparison of Marcus(the new type of robot) and John Connor.  John Connor was supposed to be the one who was going to be everyone’s ‘salvation’ against these robots but he seemed to be taking himself too seriously.  Growing up, his mom spoon fed him that nothing can be done with him in the future.  There is no such thing as destiny; right now, if you take away congress people will easily rise to take there place.  It may be bumpy but it can be done. On a nightly basis, Connor would sit in this room by himself listening to this tape from his mom, who doesn’t have anything useful to say except gibberish.  The reason I believe the others follow him is because he is a General in this hierarchy not because he’ll magically save them but if feeds into his great idea of himself.  T-4 isn’t only following him though.  His character only had one emotion, which was anger.  My favorite line kiddingly, “WHAT ARE YOU?” to Marcus as their conversation was clearly finished.

There’s Marcus.  The prisoner convict put on death row and signed his body for god knows what.  Sure, a cancer patient asked for it, but the contract had a robotics company’s name on it. He played the loner/warrior in this movie.  He’s not the type of person to hug a tree but if he sees an obstruction that isn’t right, he’ll stop it.  As much as I would hate becoming a robot’s friend no matter what movie Marcus makes you care.  My sister had a hard time understanding the concept that he wasn’t a real person.  Marcus is what will make this movie memorable.  An awkward part in the movie was at the end when Marcus came ‘home’ he took a break and got new clothes.  New clothes?  You’re in a war, buddy, no time for shopping. 

I would recommend everyone go out of their way to see this if you are a fan of Terminator, action or post apocalyptic scenarios.  The reviews from others are picky and won’t let Christian Bale go on his excitement and overdramatic acting.  Who cares?  Christian Bale does what he needs too and if he’s not doing it right the director should cut scene but I had no problem with his acting.  He does what’s needed for the part.  Just give anyone who is still thinking that push they need Arnold is in this. This get’s a A-!

Dance Flick
Now, onto Dance Flunk.  It deeply disappointed me.  When the Wayans name was slapped on this there is some prestige that came to be expected.  Don’t Drink Juice, White Chick, and the first two Scary Movies were fantastic.  How can one knock a gun battle when Marlon Wayans pulls a freaking USSR nuke from the back of his van to scare off the gangsters?  This movies storyline and pops were such a mess that it belongs in the same category as the last two Scary movie’s and the rest of the craptacular parodies that have been coming these last few years.  There is no quality in those films.  They shoot them in two weeks and children go to them because these movies are PG-13 and refer to current movies.  I can’t stand watching these movies because they even try making fun of characters that are meant to be comedic.  That’s like saying, “ha-ha, Adam Sandler’s voice sound funny when he sings the Hanukkah song!”. 

What I should’ve checked for before seeing this is the director.  Keenan Ivory Wayans is the brother that directs all of these comedic pleasure.  The brother that made a mess of this film was Damien Wayans.  Remember his as the “Crappy Wayans brother”.  I didn’t think there could be a bad Wayans brother but I found out the hard way.  Do not see this!  It gets a F!

Star Trek

An unexpected movie I didn’t plan to see was the new Star Trek.  As everyone jittered about how excited they were for this to come out I tried to warn them that the reason everyone enjoyed the original Star Trek was not because the vast technology and effects but because of the zany stories, that can only be explained by, “Because we are in space, that’s why Furbies are taking over.”  Onion had a video making fun of my point of which I made.  I should’ve posted it earlier so no one can call me a liar.  This was cool for me to see since I was a Trekie since I was in first grade but it wasn’t the original I was a fan of.  I seen all the Next Generation movies in theaters and walking into this I got those same feelings back.  I remember my whole family wanted to see Richie Rich and I refused beyond reason; they were forced to go to Star Trek Generations!  I was even Spock as a child for Halloween.  During school I always trying to do the Vulcan sleeper hold on fellow classmates and could easily do the “Peace and Prosper” hand signal.

The young and new cast did an excellent job.  I could not think of anyone that could replace them.  Seeing the commercial the person replacing Sulu was John Cho, Harold in Harold and Kumar go… It bugged me because he was the biggest name on the cast and I was nervous he was stuck on there just because he was Asian; he turned out fine.  The movie had quick build-up for the non-Star Trek fans.  This version gave Spock a girl-friend which made him more human and Kirk had a more rambunctious attitude.  I was very impressed with this versions Spock because he was non-emotional but others cared for him forcing a human side.  His loyalty towards his mother when others attacked her for what kind of species she was is great character build-up; the loyalty trait has constantly been my favorite.  Spock was even cooler when he finally used his grip technique.  Pretty much, the characters were just a tad more extreme version of what they originally were.  There’s nothing bad I can say about it except it could have been just a long episode of the series but that also goes with a plus.  I hope it does become a series.  There revamped characters were interesting and I want to get to know them even more.  The possibility of there being a Earth to stop at gives the writing team a better chance of connecting with the audience.  This movie showed me one thing that I should’ve always knew: that green aliens can be very sexy!

I love William Shatner and it pisses me off when people have the audacity to compare the two and dis Shatner because his Kirk was overdramatic.  It worked and Shatner still has it today as was seen in ‘Boston Legal.’  Everyone did the same thing with Nicholson and Ledger; both their Jokers were fantastic.  The scope of Leonard Nimoy being allowed on set and not Shatner I haven’t grasped but it would have been too corny to have both of them make cameos.  Nimoy probably needed the work anyways.  So there it is.  JJ Abrams(Cloverfield) did it again and this gets B+!

If you are in town watch me ref at ECHO wrestling in Sartell.  I’m really excited I get to meet some of these top guys, finally.  Not sure what my June plans are going to be but I assure you they will be better than “This month is a complete blank.”  Here are some things I can talk about in my next blog and still is pushing off.

Halloween 2: Sherri Moon comes back to life

Politics: How is Governor Pawlenty finishing up with his bill signing

Wild: They have a new GM

Fugitive and Doubt: Two older movies that need a review by me

JP Network: How’d my presidency go?

Prizes for the Disturbed/Killswitch Engage concert

Wolverine: Marvel and their lackluster movies; at least they put the whole X-Men: Evolution on YouTube

Blog background photo: Homicide is the best and all but it’s not me!

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